A Girl Screamed At Me

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 22:48:48 -0700

So I went to the mall earlier, and a girl screamed in my face while I was standing outside waiting for my ride. She walked right by me, and she was cute. She had short blonde hair in two braids, I mean, she was CUTE. But, I'm never going to really want to date again, so whatever. Anyway, she walked right by me with her friend, looked at me in the face, and did some sort of bat skreetch. Afterwards, she came running back and said she was just having fun, smiled, and then ran off.

Either I'm so hot that girls can't talk to me without screaming, or now people are using mating calls.

I'm going to go with the first one. Because it's so much more egotastical. No. That is NOT a word. But you still can't use it. Anyway, it was an odd experience. Rarely do girls say anything to me. I was thinking about this earlier today, and I realized women have all the power. They can chose who they want to talk to, and who they don't, and it can drive a man to madness/suicide. I'm not far from wanting the second one lately. But not only do they have THAT option, but every girl will get talked to and liked by SOMEONE. So they're NEVER alone. Men don't have that. Not all men are liked by at least one girl.

So men, we're screwed.

I propose we all turn gay.

Then women can't have children without artificial insemination.

And then the population will decrease.

And the species will die out.

MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Or, you ladies can continue to scream into my face.

Please do.

Then I can't hear your lies, like when you say, "I love you."

m@rk

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Most Suicidal Country Ever

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 20:14:14 -0700

I thought about this today:

The war in Iraq. We're over there killing people who want to kill us. But we're killing them for oil. Which goes into our cars. Which produces Global Warming. Which kills US. So basically, it boils down to, "We're fighting against people so we don't die, so we can get something to kill ourselves." America won't let anyone else kill them, hey, if anyone's gonna kill us, WE'RE gonna do it first.

Because believe me, there are probably a lot of countries that, if given the opportunity, would like to take a crack at killing America. Bombing us, infecting us with some sort of flesh eating virus, whatever. But we all think we're so much better than everyone else that we feel that nobody out there is special enough to kill us. They're not worth it. Delaware doesn't deserve to kill America, no, WE'RE gonna do it to ourselves first!

This is everyday american thinking.

Scary, isn't it?

m@rk

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What Works For You

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:11:01 -0700

For the past month and a half, I've lost all ambition, all drive, everything, to do ANYTHING. I mean, no kid wants to get up and go to school, but now I REALLY don't care. I used to believe that maybe it'd be good for me in the long run. It won't. I also used to believe that having friends is important. I'm starting to disprove that theory to myself as well, considering all my "friends" disappear when I need someone to talk to, but are CONVENIENTLY around when THEY have issues to talk about. And as for family, F*CK THEM.

In life, it's you, on your own. There's no God there to watch over, there's no Jesus to point you in the right direction. Parents and cops only enforce laws and rules, but YOU ultimately decide what you think is right and wrong. They can't teach you that. Murder may be wrong to someone, and right to someone else, and who's to say who's correct? We are all alone. And until I see some pretty convincing evidence proving otherwise, I'm sticking to that theory.

So my position is this:

Friends hate me

Family hates me

My therapist (not russ, although I'm pissed at HIM too) is a bitch and dropped me as a client, making me lose any last shred of respect for women I had

Love is stupid

Life sucks

It's all meaningless

Boy, am I depressed or what?

And ya know what, it doesn't matter. Because really, what this ends up being is the truth about what works for you. People say nobody should smoke. Well if it makes them feel better, then leave them the hell alone. Same with me, stop badgering me about being depressed. If keeping everything bottled up inside until I eventually implode upon myself and buy a rope works for me, then leave me the hell alone about it and take me as I am.

We're alone.

Get over it.

m@rk

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ChildHood Nostalgia Goes PPPFFFTTT

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 19:32:36 -0700

Here's a list of things you're told when you're a kid that you come to find out later are wrong, or just plain stupid:

*Eating uncooked cookie dough, which contain raw eggs, could allow you to contract salmonella poisoning

*Drinking 8 glasses of water a day is too much, you only need 4

*8 hours of sleep a night is too much, you only need roughly 6 at best

*If you sit too close to the television, it will NOT ruin your eyes, staring into the sun will

*If you make that face, it won't get stuck like that, and if it DOES, you can make some good money in a circus

*Eating before swimming does NOT make you cramp up, it's some myth mothers made up to CONTROL their children

*When your parents say, "We'll love you no matter what you do or become", tell them you're gay and THEN see how much they love you

*You CAN'T be anything you want when you grow up, you are stuck in a sh*tty job you'll hate depending on the grades you acquire

*Education is NOT the most important thing in the world...SURVIVING is!

*A stork does not bring children, a fairy does not bring teeth, and the court of law does not bring justice

*They will NOT tell you things when you're "older"

*Masturbation is NOT dirty...sh*tting on a salad bar at Fresh Choice is

*It doesn't matter who you vote for, they're ALL going to screw up and piss you off SOMEHOW

*NOBODY is pure colorblind in regards to race

*Experimentation (drugs, sex, w/e) is NOT wrong, it's a part of growing up and defining who you are, and how you carve your identity out for yourself

I was gonna throw in, "Not just ANYBODY could be president" but I realized Bush was in office, so...yeah, kinda defeats the purpose. Also, just a sidenote, parents should spend way more time watching who their kids hang out with and not what music they listen to or TV shows they watch that they think may be causing a "bad influence". I'm 18 and I'm already a better parent than half I've ever met.

m@rk

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Know For A Fact

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 09:33:26 -0700

There are people who say they KNOW FOR A FACT that if Barrack Obama, or McCain is elected president, they will be bad. First off, if you’re under 18, you can’t even vote, so shut up. You can discuss politics, but not to the point where you’re able to make THAT big an assumption. And BTW, the word “assumption” leads me to my second reason. That’s ALL it is, is an assumption! You can’t KNOW FOR A FACT if they’ll be a bad president because you can’t see into the future, and you won’t know for a FACT because it hasn’t happened yet! Once it happens, and they turn out to be bad, then yes, you will indeed….KNOW FOR A FACT.

Otherwise, there’s nothing but false evidence, and that’s using the word evidence lightly, to prove your THEORY. Not a fact. Kinda like evolution. If it’s a fact, why is it called a THEORY?

Think this sh*t through before you speak.

m@rk

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Commandment Question

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:30:03 -0700

They tell us that in the bible, it says God gave us free will, but then we have the 10 Commandments, which are rules we’re supposed to follow.

Um….WHAT?

Why are we given free will if we can’t really USE it fully? I just don’t get that part of it. And another commandment question is that there’s a commandment that tells us to honor thy father and mother. How dare God say that when he sent his SON TO DIE!

God doesn’t deserve “honor”, nor does he deserve “respect” from Jesus.

Doesn’t make any sense to me, and yet people fail to be able to see the logic. They say people have trouble seeing the blurred line between fantasy and reality when they read “Harry Potter”. I think the same can be said about the bible.

m@rk

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Haggling

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:28:27 -0700

So, I went to dinner at Original Joes last night, and at the end of the meal, they bring a receipt. The receipt tells you how much everything you ordered is going to cost you, and you have to slip your card into the little black book with the receipt, so they can charge your card and make sure you have the money to pay for it. Basically, in logic terms, they are asking you if you are willing to pay 45 dollars for the meal you just ate. So next time I eat out, and they say, “Your meal costs 45 dollars”, I’m going to retort with, “I don’t like that number, let’s say 43.” I’m going to haggle with them to get the cost down.

It’s also the idea of, what’re they gonna do? Throw you out? Ya already ate!

“Sir, we’d like our meal back if you don’t pay.”

“You’d have to wait about 3 days. In fact, I’ll doggy bag it for you, leave it on your porch, and I’ll even set it on fire, ya know, to COOK it. You can put it out with your foot.”

Restaurants seriously need to reconsider their payment issues. Otherwise, how will I ever learn to be a hobo and dine and dash?

m@rk

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Respect Of Kids

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 09:27:10 -0700

Having kids is a BAD idea.

But let me explain. My stance on children is this: I want none. I have enough of my own personal issues to deal with, it would just be cruel to bring a child into this world, a child who I may neglect because of my own issues, and a child who may not want to be alive anyway…hey, they don’t ASK to be born, okay? Hooray for run on sentences. Anyway, I don’t want kids, and besides, it seems wrong to bring a kid into this world, look around and see how f*cked up it is already, I mean, come ON!

BUT, I think some people have to be parents to show their parents that they are better parents. It’s a control issue thing. They have to prove to the people who did such a sh*tty job of raising THEM that they can do a better job, egotistical, am I right?

Some people only had kids in order to (my aunt did this) have someone to take care of them when they get older and feeble. Her mind’s already gone that way. Again, how cruel can you GET? Some people beat their children, even adopted ones, which I don’t get. If you adopted something to give it a better home, why would you BEAT IT?! Ugh.

Nothing has really made sense in the past month or so, since about may 8th. But whatever. I’m done talking to parents, about parents, and just having kids is a bad idea unless you’re going to treat them with RESPECT. Parents complain about how their kids don’t respect them…well maybe if you respected your KID….ya never know. They always say, “treat others how YOU would like to be treated.” They preach crap they NEVER follow.

Also, I think I’m about a tear and a half away from a nervous breakdown. As this post may clearly show. But it doesn’t matter. Parents are what drove me to it. I mean, for gods sakes, my own step-father makes me wanna kill myself. How good of parenting is THAT?!

Parents: Practice what you preach

Kids: Be a little more mature

Everyone Else: Sod off

m@rk

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Password

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Sun, 13 Jul 2008 09:26:27 -0700

So, I was just signing up for a new yahoo mail account to use for a project, and when it came time to apply for a password, this is what it told me:

Cannot include your name, ID, or the word “password”

Who the hell would use the word “password” as their password? It’s SO obvious. It’s like using “access code” for something that needs an access code. I just don’t think it’s a good idea to use that. Let alone the others either, especially your name. Gee, I wonder what markwiland@yahoo’s password is? Hmmm….TRY HIS NAME! Again, WAY too obvious, it should be something that nobody would EVER think about trying.

Like “ihavegenitaherpes”.

Just something totally out there and not right. Something you’d never tell anyone, because of the shame it may cause you, like, “iliketolickcatbutts” or something. Or “ihavearashonmylefttesticle”.

Ya know, I feel that we can stop here. They’re only going to get worse if I continue.

m@rk

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Talking To People

nobody@vox.com(Mark Wiland) — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 09:25:49 -0700

I don’t like talking to people face to face. Certain things are usually required of you when you speak to people face to face. Such as, looking them straight in the eyes. It’s considered polite. Most of the people (students, teachers, people on the street) that I’ve talked to (excluding friends & what not), are FU*KIN’ UGLY. I don’t wanna look at them! And what if they have some sort of deformity, like they’ve only got one nostril, you’re not gonna look them in the eye, you’re gonna spend the entire time staring at that asshole’s nose, saying to yourself, “WHERE THE FU*K IS THIS GUY’S NOSTRIL?!”

This is why I like talking to people online. No face to face, and even in chats, you can ignore what someone says for like, 15 minutes, do something completely different, and then come back and keep talking. Where they gonna go? They have as little a life as YOU do! Probably even LESS of a life, ’cause they actually WAITED for you! Or, if you get bored of the conversation, you can jerk off. And leave little hints so they can try and find out what you’re doing. Some chats put what song you’re listening to when you’re talking to someone. So when you jerk off, play the song “Jerk it out”. Just to mess with ‘em.

But because we don’t have face to face through a computer, some jackhole decided to make video chat. And the term INTERFACE. Just to make us hermits even MORE miserable, right? Two things are wrong with vid chat:

1. You feel like a loser if you don’t have it, why don’t you have all the new stuff they have? You’re not good enough?

2. You can’t say no, and if you SAY no, you feel like an asshole, and you could be trapped there for as long a time as a FACE TO FACE CONVO!

I tell ya, I’d rather just not talk to people AT ALL. But that can’t happen. Who would I make fun of? I’d be out of a job.

m@rk

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